Navigating Your 20s: Lessons in Growth, Failure, and Humility - EP5

Navigating Your 20s: Lessons in Growth, Failure, and Humility - EP5

In this episode, we embark on a profound exploration of the journey through your 20s, a pivotal decade filled with growth, failures, and valuable lessons. Reflecting on our own experiences, we delve into the transition from late teens to mid-20s and beyond, discussing the newfound freedom at 18, the humbling moments of realizing you don't know everything, and the critical importance of learning from failures.

Inspired by the wisdom of Simon Sinek, we draw parallels between life and an endless mountain climb, emphasizing that the true adventure lies in the continuous path forward. We share personal stories about overcoming obstacles, dealing with setbacks, and the pitfalls of rigid deadlines. Highlighting the value of human interaction and community in today's tech-driven world, we discuss the significance of open discussions and processing emotions.

As we reflect on the lessons learned in our 20s, we focus on personal and leadership development, encouraging listeners to maintain an open mindset and continuously seek growth. Whether you're in the midst of your 20s or looking back, this candid and heartfelt conversation offers valuable insights into embracing growth and navigating life's ups and downs.

Join us for this episode and share your thoughts. Let's support each other on this incredible journey of life!

Transcript

We're gonna be talking about growing and maturing through your 20s. Through your 20s. Very interesting topic we have today, I feel like. Yeah, yeah. So we're gonna get into a little bit about, you know, the third decade of your life, our lives. 

Some of the things we've experienced so far.

This is gonna be very based on our own experiences to date. Your 20s we think is a very important decade of your life. So a lot of this is gonna be based on our own experiences thus far. What do you want to start with? So, right at the beginning? Right at the beginning. The early? Let's do it. Just before, just before 20?

Right at 18. Right at 18. Let's do it. Okay. Okay.  

Who are you at 18? 

Who was I at 18? Oh boy. 18, I was, I was just, I was something else. 

Yeah. 

Not gonna lie. You know, I thought I knew everything and  Reach. That's one of the downfalls, definitely, of being that young. You think you know everything. Yeah. And you know, it's, before you know it, you're getting slapped in the face and you're like, oh shit. 

Damn it. I was not smart. You know.  Yeah. So, um, there's definitely a lot of things I feel anyway, that just ambush you right off the bat at 18. Yep. You know what I mean? Um, a lot of governments or societies out there, whatever you wanna call it, classify you as an adult. As an adult at 18. Yep. Right. A lot of responsibility.

Lot of responsibility. So much responsibility. There's a lot of things that eventually get thrown your way, you know, if, um. You haven't started driving at 16, you know, let's say you started 18,  you know, you're going to start making car payments, car insurance. And 

you did know what you wanted to do.  And you kind of started on the path, but then  you had a moment where you're like, do I want to go back to school right away?And I mean, speaking from experience for someone who took a year off, then went, actually I took two years off. I went back to university just before I turned 20. So, and then I went for two years and I was like, you know what? 

I can find a job where I make just as much as money as I will a junior architect. So why even do this? And I was like, I'll just leave university, go get a job where I can make just as much money and pay these student loans off in no time. 

Yeah.  

Because again, at 22, I still kind of thought I knew everything.

And I was like, whatever.  Even my choice to leave school wasn't because I necessarily wanted to. I was just like,  I'm here. I did it. It's the money I'll pay back, whatever.  So again, I think it plays into that, you know, you're 18, you're young, you're 19, 20, you're young, you think you know a lot, and the world's I mean the world at 18, once you get out of high school and everybody starts looking at you like an adult, and you're like, I have freedom, I have a vehicle, I can go where I want, I can do what I want, like  There's just so much freedom that I think is suddenly given to you at 18 Right, right and you and I grew up with childhoods where we like we did a lot of playing and stuff and had like freedom As kids.

Yeah, I can imagine kids these days that are all like on their iPads and stuff then they turn 18 It's like hey the world's your oyster. Yeah, like we had very exposed childhoods. I could almost say And even for us at 18, we're like more freedom seriously, and what do you do with it? Yeah, and yeah, especially when you think you know everything.

Mm hmm. Yeah, so it was uh, it was a very confusing time And I thought me personally going through that experience. I thought whatever I did two years. I'll pay these loans off. Who cares?  Yeah, because then again, I thought I knew it all 

right  and I means  This is coming from someone. I didn't go to post secondary You  So, there are times, you know, where I start thinking like, Oh man, maybe I should have, maybe I would have, you know, more of my life together, or, Yeah, a better job, make more money, you know what I mean?

But at the same time, I then tell myself,  Yeah, but you'd have student loans to pay back. And you'd still be paying those back, man.  

There's a certain half of my life where we're still paying back student loans. 

Yeah, and I mean, You know, So I mean that part of me eventually, you know  trumps the  Damn. I should've went back, but 

I wasn't the kind of kid who could work all summer to pay for my next two semesters of school.

I was like, if the government's going to give me money, I'm going to take it. And that would have been my mentality. Well, probably like majority of everyone. Yeah. I think it takes a special kid to be like, no, I'm going to work my whole summer away and pay for my whole two semesters. Not me, bro. No way. The government's going to give me money.

Bring it on government. 

We talked last time about, uh,  Majority of me growing up, I wanted to be a chef, right? Yep. Yep. So if I had went to Nate for that,  I could probably tell you, yeah, I probably would have quit. Knowing, already having tons of experience in the industry, Yeah, I probably wouldn't have finished that out. 

But then like, this is the other thing. We've both worked in restaurants. We've worked with Red Seal people. We've worked with people who just grew up in the industry gaining experience. Yes. But honestly, who have been the better people to work with in your experience?  Not the Red Seal students personally.

The ones without technical training. Yeah. Yeah. Because so many people go back to school early through your  early teens, early twenties. 

Right.  

You just you keep going to school and you keep going to school and you miss out on some life experience stuff So you become very book smart, but when it comes to real world application and real world smarts  I don't regret dropping after two years.

Oh and like  having these last I guess over a decade now to just live life experience different things. I think that's been way more beneficial than oh 100 percent Honestly a book smart person. Yeah, 

it's it's taught me I feel like way more valuable Lessons. Yeah, and i've learned a lot more From actual life experience than I feel I would have Going to post secondary.

Yep. You know what I mean? Yep  Yeah, they don't they don't teach you nothing about life experience in 

those places. Nope. They definitely don't know. Yep And that's that's from 18 to 22 and you're just you have a lot of freedom You have a lot of time and you're like i'm just gonna do this and I don't  You don't really care about decisions you make at that time Which personally I think 18 to like your mid 20s You It's fine.

Oh, yeah, it's the probably the best time to go out make mistakes learn things  but yeah, so you have all this freedom and all this ability from 18 to 22 and you're just like experiencing life and then  You get slapped in the face by reality 

Quite literally quite 

literally. 

Yeah, where uh, you realize, you know, nothing. Yeah. What age was that for you?  Twenty six. 

Me too. Yep. Twenty six. Weirdly enough. Definitely. Um,  twenty six, I was coming out of my early twenties stupor, I guess, and I'm so awesome.  I realized Yeah, it was time to get more for myself.

It was time to, I don't necessarily want to say get my shit together Because I don't really like that term but Cuz do you really ever have it together? Right? No, stop 

Facts. Yeah  So yeah, 26 was when I really started to  Shut my mouth and open my ears a little bit more, you know, listen to the people that do know more than I do hear what they're saying, you know, apply their advice to day to day activities. You know what I mean? And I can honestly say that shutting up and opening my ears, it's, it's helped me learn a lot and it's opened my eyes to how,  I'll say silly I was  earlier.

I was a silly goose. Yeah  Would you say that when you realize that there's? a moment in your life that like slapped you in the face where you're like I need to Clearly I need to stop thinking i'm amazing and start listening to other people  Um, Because for me I had a moment. I'll tell you about my moment.

Yeah, I might have to think about that. Okay, you think about that, because I clearly had a defining moment. It was, I was working for a restaurant group, not going to name names. And I thought I was going to become the next GM of a location. I was just an assistant GM. So I thought my next thing was GM.  The time was coming and my bosses told me that they would not have a 26 year old run one of their restaurants.

They didn't feel a 26 year old was mature enough. I was so offended. Two weeks later, I put in my two week notice and I quit and I left and I was like, fine, you don't want me. I'm going to go somewhere else because I'm awesome. I went somewhere else. I got another job. I was not awesome.  And, uh, I, I look back.

I was also 26. Right. Um, and I, I look back on that time. If that didn't happen,  I don't think  I would have necessarily had that same change when I was just as young. Cause the same thing when it happened to me, when I realized at my new job that, you  Shit. Maybe I don't know everything. Maybe like I do have a lot to learn.

And the restaurant I had left was the first one I started in. It was the one I'd been in a long time. So like I was very comfortable with it, but it took switching to a different brand with slightly different standards, values, expectations, whereas like, Oh, there's a lot more to this job than what I have been exposed to for the last six years.

Right. Um, and, and yeah, it was a very.  Eye opening, humbling moment, um, and I have believed in self development and humbling yourself ever since. Right. A lot of people don't make that jump, but it, it,  it was painful,  but it had to happen. So that was, that was my defining moment. Again, at 26, it was just like, you know, nothing. 

John Snow.  

And I was John Snow.  And not happy about it.  Um, yeah, no, I honestly I can't say that there was really a major defining moment.  I think one day  I just realized that I just realized that  I want, I wanted more for my life. I still do want more for my life. And I said to myself, in order to do that, you're going to have to set your own pride and opinions and beliefs aside for the moment  and  really take in, I guess,  Yeah, advice and life experience and just from older people around me.

Yeah. I mean, I went through some rough shit while I was going through that stuff, you know, yourself and chef and,  you know, even some of the other managers there at the time, you know, they really helped me open my eyes and learn that, you know, everything will eventually be okay. You know what I mean? It's, it's kind of necessary sometimes to just.

Shut up and watch. Yep. And listen,  I'm sure you know this, but there was a time  at  the restaurant we were working at where  I was just lost. I was lost. My attitude was piss poor. I was mad at everyone. I was just being a real jerk. Yeah. No, you guys helped pull me out of that. Uh, I don't know if you like necessarily knew, but at the same time I was like,  these are good people. 

And, I can't let my own issues  affect them. You know what I mean?Yeah. Um, but no, before that, like at other jobs previous to that, I had, I'd gone through times of failing. Um, I'd gone through times of trying new things and being confronted with people who don't know how to fail. Um, And I think one of the biggest things that changed for me in my late twenties, early thirties, um, was accepting the failures.

Okay. Like, if you don't get it right,  that's fine. Do you know what you just got to do though? Just own it. If you mess up, if you fail, just, just like,  unless you're a doctor or something, it's not like we're saving lives in most industries. No, that's a big one. Yeah. That's a big one. Just, yeah, you have, you have to be okay with failure and, um, we've mentioned it before.

Yeah. Like sometimes, yeah. Sometimes I have to talk to them at work and be like, Hey, you know,  you reset this table. Incorrect.  And even if you say, or if you say, Hey, like the way you did, that's wrong. They're like, what do you mean? It's like, and they, they like freak out. And then they think you're mad at them.

And it's like, no, like it's okay to make mistakes. 

We're human. You need to, you need to make those mistakes in order to learn and grow and become a better person. You know what I mean? If you don't make those mistakes,  you're not learning anything. 

You're really not. You're really not. No. And I mean, if we go back and be real, when I was 18, if someone was like, Oh, that's Ron.

I was like, whatever.  No, it's not. You, you're just looking at it funny. You're wrong. I did it right. So I get with time, there comes a certain maturity where, you know, accepting  the fact that you're going to fail and allowing yourself to fail, I think is a big milestone for a lot of people. But I think at the end of your twenties, if you can come to that realization that, you know what?

Like  it's okay to fail. It's what you do. Like if it, if you fail. The most important thing is how do I get out of this or how do I correct it?  You can't wallow in it right because that's just sad. That's just um, But failure is going to happen mistakes are going to happen. That's part of life. Yeah, it's what you do after those mistakes Um that I think really define you and your future characters.

You're growing. Yeah Yep. 

I'm, not a fan of those people that  Make mistake Are 100 fully aware  That they made that mistake and they play it off like they know nothing.  

Or that they,  or their mistake isn't actually a mistake. It was the best situation for them.  But they still went about it wrong and refused to take any sort of ownership over it.

Yeah, exactly. Yeah. No, if like, we're people, we're going to make mistakes. It's okay to fail, but take accountability. Accountability. That, that's, I think the other half of it is accountability. So many people are afraid to be like, Hey,  I messed up. I made a mistake.  I was wrong. Yeah, it's okay to say you're wrong 100 percent but if you stand there and you're like nope Wasn't me.

I didn't do this. Yeah, or oh, no it well It was the best decision for me at the moment just because it's the best decision for you Doesn't mean it doesn't affect others around you. Yeah And that's, I think accountability is so huge. So many people just string people along through a web of lies just to avoid admitting like, Hey, you know what?

I made a mistake,  but if, and we have a little list in front of us, if you're watching the video, this is why I keep gesturing. Um, but like after I think you're late twenties, you, you need to accept that you're going to fail and learn how to figure that out  because if you can't, you're just going to hurt other people in the process.

If you're humble enough to.  Take accountability for your actions. That's progress right there. That is progress. That is growth right there. 

Accountability is probably one of the most humbling things you can do for yourself. Yep. And to anybody listening who is younger,  it's okay to fail. It's okay to allow yourself to fail.

Because guess what you usually learn through that?  A, what not to do next time. Yep. And B, If it does happen again, you know, a  workaround. So you'll probably be able to see the mistake before it even happens. I think that's probably the greatest thing about learning through failure. And it's, it's actually a pretty big, um, subject topic.

Category is learning through failure.  

I think one of the worst things you can do while learning through failure is get defensive. You know what I mean? Yep. Yeah. Yeah, don't get defensive. It's not going to do you any good. Uh, it's not going to do anyone any good in all honesty. You know what I mean? Makes you look like a dickhead.

Yep. And  you know, in all honesty, I feel like people lose respect for people like that. You know what I mean? They're simply trying to help you out. And then they come back with, Hey, get out of my face. Yep. And you're like, well, fine. 

Yep. And I mean, us being millennials, uh, we were introduced to the cell phones and the social media and the whole. 

Culture shift towards the very me focused society that we have today  So yeah, I can definitely say when I was younger. I was that kind of person too. It's like no I'll figure I either I know how to do it or I'll figure it out. 

I'm just like  I've been doing this for so long. I'm pretty sure there's no other way to do it. Yeah, but I say  You know what?  Let's try that. Mm hmm. Let's try something. Yeah,  and then if it doesn't work I look at them and say you're wrong  I'm kidding. I don't do that. 

But I mean on top of that  It just creates a positive environment.

You know what I mean? People being able to communicate openly and freely, offer suggestions and advice and whatever it may be in order for things to go smoothly. You know what I mean? And so I think  just, um, being aware of that is, you know, it just helps create a positive environment wherever the hell you may be.

Yep. 

And honestly, even through, you know, the last part of your 20s, the 26 to 30. Once you, once you can accept humbling yourself and being like, you know what, maybe I'm not right all the time. Um, I think it's very powerful because you see people I've worked with people, you've probably worked with people where they're older than us.

Oh, you're a kid. Yeah. So you're just figuring it out. And then 26 to 30, just like taking in some of that experience,  humbling yourself, being afraid or not being afraid, uh, not being afraid to fail, facing some real adversity.

Cause you know, you're going to go through some stuff. Yes. We've all been through some stuff  and adversity. It, it hurts.  Um, There are times that absolutely suck. Yep. And they are shitty.  But find some people that can, you know, be there for you through them. Mm hmm. It's, it's a life changing.  Throughout these past few years of my later 20s, like I was saying earlier, I really started to  Humble myself, you know what I mean?

I've realized that,  like I said earlier, I just simply do not know everything. Um, there's so much that I still need to learn, um,  about life and about myself even, you know what I mean? Um,  I've experienced lows and highs and anxiety, depression, everything that comes with mental health. Um,  Yeah, I got myself into, you know, a bad crowd doing some things I probably shouldn't have been doing.

Yeah. Um, and you know, that carried on for a little longer than I would have liked. But, I did know that something needed to change at that point in my life. And I am proud of myself at the fact that I did make that change. You know what I mean? I'm here. Mm hmm. You're welcome. Knowing what I know, I'm proud of you too. 

Thanks, man. Um, one of these episodes, we're going to cry. I promise. 

Yeah, it'll happen. 

But yeah, that's pretty much been my 20 so far, man, just figuring out life, figuring out who I am as an individual.  Realizing that there's so much out there that I still need to learn in order to grow into the man I'm supposed to be. Um,  yeah, I'm, I'm still on that journey. You know what I mean? And honestly, I can't wait to see where it takes me.

I know that's, that's honestly the exciting thing. Yeah. I mean, I wouldn't say I necessarily regret any of my past because it's definitely taught me a lot about what I want and what I don't want.  Um,  . So yeah, like we were saying, you know, I think it's important to fail Yep. And go through adversity. Yep. And come out a better human.

Yep. You know what I mean? You can either make that choice, you can continue down the path of whatever path you're on. Mm-Hmm. . And continue those negative feelings or addiction or whatever it may be. Yep.  You can make a change. Yep.  It's a simple actually I shouldn't say it's as simple as that because it's a lot easier said than done.

Yeah, trust me I'm 

speaking from experience But I I think making the decision  to become a a different person a better person.  I Think it's a lot more hard work than  Staying where you were. Yeah, even even for myself when I thought I knew everything yeah, like going through that phase of where I had to humble myself and be like I I  I don't know everything and they were right.

So how do, how do I learn more? Like how, how do I be a better person? It was a journey. It was a struggle. It was not comfortable.  I've seen this stupid quote a few times. It's like staying in your comfort zone is the most, um, deadly thing you can do for yourself. And I was always like, whatever, stupid, inspirational quotes. 

Until they become true.  And you're like, yeah, if I would have stayed comfortable,  

Yep. Yep. Yep.  If there's something I've learned in my 20s, it's definitely take it as it comes. There's no point in stressing over the future. Yep. You know what I mean? If you have a problem, think to yourself, is there any thing that I can do about this at this exact moment?

And if the answer is no. Stop worrying. It's true. You know what I mean? I know it's a lot easier said than done to stop worrying, but  if there is nothing that you can do about that problem at that exact moment where you are experiencing stress and anxiety. Yep.  There's no point, man. 

Yep. I had someone say that to me at a job once, um, where they're like, Hey, this is a situation that's happening.

Can you personally affect it in any way? It's like, no. They're like, okay.  What's the outcome? I'm like, well, it'll probably be this. And they're like, can you affect the outcome? And I'm like, no. Like, okay.  After the outcome, what's the solution? Can you affect that? And I was like, yeah, I think I can affect that.

And they're like, start focusing on that.  Cause if you can't change what's already happening or affect what's already happened, yeah,  don't stress about it. It, which sounds a lot easier said than done. I get it. Um, it's taken me years to learn how to fricking do that, man. It takes all of us years. Um, I actually had it put to me once in analogy of climbing an endless mountain, which sounds very tedious, but.

I mean, you know, once you get to a peak, you're there, but if you're on a journey of life, are you ever really there? Hmm. Questions to think of, but anyway, never ending mountain. Like you said, if you had a routine and you're like, okay, like we're going to get to that peak this time tomorrow. What happens if you're like going through your little journey on the woods And there's like some fallen logs and you have to like switch that up And you don't get to where you wanted to the next day, you know where you're going You want to get to that like little ridge or whatnot?

You might not get there tomorrow though, but you'll get there Yeah, i'll tell you what I heard from simon sinek once if you wake up every day go to the gym 20 30 minutes Eventually, you'll get fit when you'll get fit. Who knows who knows but it's these little steps every day  Taking control of what you can control Eventually if you have a vision Of where you want to get to.

You'll get there. Can't tell you when.  Cause every path is different. But, you'll get there. And it's by doing those little things. 

Me too. That's why I hate deadlines, man. Cause if you set a deadline, and you don't get there.  You're just stressed. Yeah. And anxious. Well, you think you're a failure. Exactly. And you're like, damn it.

Yep. You know what I mean? And that's just more useless stress and anxiety that no one needs. Nobody needs it. Nobody needs it. Yep. You know, it's yeah. 

And yes, we do sit here probably making this sound super easy, super easy. Um, we, we may make it sound easy, but This is coming from our years and years of going through this exact shit 

I mean if you go from 18 to now, that's a decade for you.

That's 15 years for me Yeah, like it it it takes time but once you get here you look back and you're like if only I knew all this sooner and Even when I was younger, I listened to people say these kinds of things. So again, it's not like we're telling you Where we're sitting here saying, this is what you need to do.

You do it. Do it right now. Um, cause remembering back, I, I would hear things like this and be like, okay, yeah, whatever. Tell me what to do. Try me. But now I look back and I'm like, you know, if, if I would have given it just a little bit of consideration, just a tiny bit. And especially in the world that we're in now where like there's such a lack of human interaction and human, just. 

And just, you know, I think society for being what it is, which is human interaction. Um, I think it's important that these discussions exist more now than ever to be honest. Let us be honest. Let us be very important discussions.  

I actually have.  A story that fits perfect into this. It actually happened at work today.

I'm ready for story time. Um, okay, so yeah, this was like right in the morning or whatever. And I was finishing up some framing, so I had to go upstairs and I had to get some more, we call it hat track.  Hat track. Had to get some more hat track. Hat track. Um,  so I got up, I went up to level four or whatever, and one of the HVAC guys is, uh,  Yelling and cussing out the rap student our company just got right for rap students.

Oh, just wait. Okay  But he was only doing that because this 18 year old rap student was Mouthing him off. Mm hmm, you know  Pretending he knew everything, you know what? I mean this this guy this rap student has done nothing but sweep hallways for the past two weeks and He's telling the HVAC tech  You know where to go and how to get there  and I'm looking at this kid and I'm like, what are you doing? 

You you've literally been in the industry for two weeks. Yeah, shut your mouth man like you have no right to say what you said and That that literally just goes back to you think you know everything. Yep. You know what I mean? And somebody tells you That you're doing it wrong or they have a faster way.

He got defensive. Mm hmm. Anyway, yeah He went they went back and forth for a good few minutes And I just couldn't believe that this kid kept what frickin ragging him on like that. I was like, buddy,  

that's too much It's everywhere everywhere It's kids that have been brought up in the smartphone social media society where it's all about me.

It's centered around me  and Me, me, me. It's, it's very self centered. So yeah, I think 18 year olds nowadays, their level of, Oh, I know it all is so much times five. Oh, compared to when we were 18. Yeah. Yeah. Easily. Oh yeah. Easily. They're like, Oh, well,  my buddy's dad is a HVAC contractor or something. So like, I know everything. 

Have you ever tried to air balance a building? You probably don't even know what HVAC stands for. 

Probably doesn't even know what air balancing is. Probably not. I'm surprised I even know. Probably doesn't even know what a duct is.  Quack quack? Duct. Oh.  Hard T. Hard T. Not a K.  

I was kidding. I knew he said duct. 

What happens after, 30? Corey? Corey? Well, tell me about the beginning of your 30s, after our third decade of growing and being humbled. 30 and on. You ready for it?  I don't know.  

Maybe I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. That's that's my answer I think so far for me it has been taking what I've learned through my 20s taking those life experiences  Taking what I've learned through different work situations and stuff like that and really a finding what I enjoy.

Yeah Which tends to be more? personal self development plus leadership development  my goal is  To help people learn What is now being referred to as human skills instead of soft skills, but human skills. Yeah helping people learn Human skills for them within their communities, right? Just so we can become a more tight knit community again get that social interaction out there Apparently I've already been doing it and it's kind of been working.

So Kale's subject a apparently  Which is very touching  

from this man. Thanks.  

I don't even know what to say. Um, but yeah, honestly, my personal goal is to take my life experiences so far, um, build on them, try some different things in my thirties. Um,  obviously I've put a timeline on the industry that I'm currently in.

Uh, it's not going to be a forever thing. So now I'm looking at. How I can take my experiences so far and help them benefit other people and yeah, just taking those life experiences Leveraging them in my 30s and I'd say we're finding the skills. I've learned. I think I'm in a refinement stage Love it.

Yeah still learning new things always but I think I've learned  A lot that I feel comfortable playing with where now it's time to refine, learn and share. Right on. Yeah. That's awesome. So that's what you have to look forward to. That's what I have to If you keep going down this path, so,  of being a good person.

Of being a good person. And that's the path. Yeah, be 

a good person. Yeah. Guys, there's way too many assholes out there nowadays.  Yeah. And Way too many people choose to be that way, you know what I mean? I think they're yeah, no, you don't need to lighten up not take life. So seriously, I Understand shit happens.

Yeah, you know there there is times to be sad and Miserable and grieving and we all have them. I cried last week  because as of this podcast I had a I have a I had a cat pass away two months ago That I didn't realize I loved as much as I did and I had a solid cry a week ago about it And it came out of nowhere.

It just like emotion smacked me in the face and I just I just cried Yeah, which is healthy. 

Yeah, you have to process those feelings. You have to process feelings. You can't bottle that shit up, man I don't care what anyone says. I don't care how tough you think you are Don't bottle that stuff up. No, you can't let it flow.

It's gonna build up and boil over and you are gonna snap Whether it be a mental breakdown Or aggression out the ass. Yep, or you know what I mean? It's going to happen and that's why  A lot of these guys I work with in the industry, I feel, anyway, are the way they are, you know what I mean? Like we've talked about earlier, they can't, they feel like they can't express how they feel, or they're afraid to because it's not, being a tough guy.

Um,  but yeah, so they bottle it up, it builds, and then it just boils over.  Before you know it you're screaming at some dude about this piece of scrap 

metal on the floor  Yeah, don't bottle your emotions and something you said like 30 seconds ago I know we said we're not professionals or anything and you know Take whatever advice we give you lightly if there's a piece of advice I can give and I'm going to give it and take it Digest it,  please try and progress through your life with an open mindset  We can I definitely plan on discussing an open mindset later But just to touch on it with maturing and growing through your twenties, if you are someone who gets through most of your twenties and you find that you had to have adversities in life, or like maybe you  don't get along with people, um, as much as you'd like to.

And the first words that come out of your mouth is, well, I don't care what they think because I am who I am. And if they don't like me for who I am, then I guess I don't need them.  Please, my advice is never get stuck in the loop where, well, I am who I am. If you say I am who I am, that's you just basically giving up on any sort of self development, future development,  because  who you are right now might not be the same person you are in five years.

Nope, probably won't be it and I don't think it should be. No, I don't think so either if you don't grow I don't trust people that don't grow me neither. I really don't and the ones that get stuck in that Well, I am who I am. I've always been this way so a personally, uh Like they say the first step to knowing you have a problem is knowing you have a problem And if your first words out of your mouth or I am who I am i've always been this way, you know You have the problem.

You are the problem and now you're choosing to not do anything about that problem. Yeah You So you you aren't who you are you are choosing to stay  The way you've chosen to be. Yeah. Mm hmm. Yeah. Yep, and yeah  bubble people bubble people  Yeah, that's gonna be a conversation. It will be a conversation. It's gonna so yeah  The advice for today do not stay or get comfortable in it.

I am who I am 

If you find yourself comfortable in any situation in life whatsoever You  Push yourself harder. You know what I mean? Go touch some grass. Go touch some grass. Find something that will give you a challenge. Yep. You know? Yep.  Cause if you're comfortable for too long, I'll tell you what, that's no good.

Nope. That's no good. You're not growing.  Eventually, from personal experience anyway, you start  to get sad, depressed, mad, irritable. Yep. Um, cause you just, you feel like you have nothing going for ya. Yep. You know what I mean? You feel like you're just.  Trapped in day to day life and  That's that's that yep, you know what I mean?

Yeah, and then it becomes that vicious cycle where you're like And it leads to people who go down the thought path of well, bad things always happen to me, this always happens to me. No, it's because you've gotten yourself into this hole where you're not trying new things. Life should be scary sometimes.

Yeah, 100%. You should have moments where your heart's racing and you're like, I don't know what this outcome's gonna be. If it's not scary, it's not worth it. Exactly. And if, if you always avoid that, yeah, you're, you're going to become sad and you're going to get stuck in these little holes and depressions.

Yeah. 

I mean, the people that get stuck in the holes, that's, that's their own doing at that point. You know what I mean? They're choosing not to get better and they're putting the blame on everyone else rather than looking inward and saying, Oh, Hey, maybe I'm the problem. Maybe I have some things I need to work on.

You know what I mean? For a lot of people, that's, that's just. Alien talk.  

I could be the problem. What?  That's insane. Not me. I think it'd be cool if in like 10 years we could revisit this and be like Maturing through your 30s, right?  That'd be awesome guess what we still knew nothing 

I would be okay with that because it means I would have learned a whole another decade of stuff things. Yeah. 

Well guys, I mean  I guess that's pretty much everything. Yeah. We wanted to touch on this episode and hopefully you guys gained something from it, 

you know? Leave us a comment. Leave us a message, you know, like how are you feeling again?

The whole point of this podcast is to try and open up discussions, you know I feel like some people might feel alone or alienated so we want to be here We want to open it up and you know, hopefully you guys are having conversations off of our conversation Yeah, if you are we'd love to hear about it.

Yeah, we're just going and growing and going 

and growing still figuring it out And I mean, yeah, like we've said, you know, you never really stop growing  Just find new things to learn, and I mean, if you're in the age range of 18 to 25, you know, I just want to emphasize, like, it's okay to not know everything.

Goodbye. Bye. Bye